long time...

   I'm so sorry I haven't posted. I haven't been able to think right for awhile. 

   We had this end of the year school party with our parents there and everything. Kind of like a promotion ceremony to just have fun for next year. Well afterwards was a dance, and I was sure I'd catch Caleb's attention. My hair was in ringlets and my dress was light, and went just above my knees in a cream color that set off my sun tan skin. For the first time I felt pretty. I walked in and it felt like a Cinderella story, everybody looked. Lizzy looked amazing as well, like a princess. I went to my place in line which was across from Lizzy, and awaited the dance. After the "Promotion Ceremony" was over the dance begun. Us girls took off our shoes and rocked out to the DJ, the first slow song came on, "A thousand Years" By Christina Perri, which is one of my favorite songs. I cross my fingers and pray Caleb asks me. I'm on my toes searching for him excitement overtakes me, I'm sure he'll ask. I turn around and see his hands on this pretty, rich, talented girls waist. I wish I could dislike her but sadly, she's a nice person as far as I know. I couldn't speak or even breath. My friend who I had been goofing around with (she had no idea I liked him) knew something was wrong. I felt the color drain from my face and soon I wanted to be alone so I could cry, which RARELY happens. My mood was in the dump after that, no more excitement, I had to force laughter out and my smiles were fake as well. But the worst part is that Caleb had been frequently talking to me, before he would glance at me in the hallway and not say a word, I wondered what I did wrong. He began talking to me just a week before school ended and I began thinking (hoping) he liked me.  

     Another slow song came on "All Of Me" and I was once again standing next to my friend. Caleb walked by me to the bathroom. When he came back he stared at me as he was walking in my direction. My heart started pounding and it burst when he walked right past me. Should I just have ask'd him? would that ruin our friendship? now when I hear those songs I just get sad and depressed I hate it. I hate love. I hate stupid school dances. Why did I ever get my hopes up? I knew it would just lead to another aching heart.

~Love, Ronan